What’s the most important kind of love?
As we approach the month of love, it’s easy to get swept away in romantic ideals and focus our intentions on those we are in relationships with, or to feel saddened if we are alone or without a partner. Valentine’s Day means something different to us all but ultimately it comes down to connection, or the lack of connection we have with others.
But what about the relationship we have with ourselves? What about loving ourselves? It’s something we seldom consider and that is often – wrongly – seen as selfish or a luxury we don’t have time for.
We talk about self-love a lot here at Indigo Moon, but what does it actually mean? Self-love is often confused with self-care but the act of loving yourself goes way deeper than the occasional bubble bath, manicure or gym session.
A lack of self-love often manifests as deep unhappiness, low self-worth, putting the needs of others before ourselves, lack of trust in relationships, an unfulfilling job or a lack of control in our own life.
Buddha said “You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection” and we truly believe this at Indigo Moon.
Self-love is about knowing your value and worth, it’s about taking the time to understand your own needs, quieting the inner critic and setting clear boundaries for yourself and others. It is the complete and utter acceptance of who you are and the act of fully loving every part of you without judgement.
What would it feel like to truly take a moment to give yourself the limitless love you so freely give out every day?
It starts with getting to know yourself, fully and without judgement, with giving yourself space to connect with your inner truth and learning to appreciate and accept all that you are.
Try the following 5 simple things to give yourself an immediate boost and once you raise your inner vibration of love, then it can freely overflow to others.
Build Compassion for yourself
Find yourself a piece of Rhodonite, the ultimate stone of self-love. Connect with your crystal by simply holding it and asking it to work for your highest good. After spending a few minutes of contemplation with this stone you will be filled with a deep sense of connection, tenderness and kindness towards yourself.
Rhodonite will help to heal matters of the heart, dissolving away negativity and helping you to cultivate compassion and self-love.
Learn to say No
Next time somebody asks you to do something you don’t feel comfortable with or don’t have time for, simply say ‘No’. You need offer no explanation, just simply decline the request and notice how much calmer and empowered you feel within yourself.
Silence the inner critic
Start to take note of how you speak to yourself. If you regularly find you rebuke your mistakes, call yourself ugly or fat or tell yourself how stupid you are, then just take a minute to ask, “Would I ever say those things to someone I love? Then why am I abusing myself like this?”
Once you become aware of all the horrible ways you speak to yourself, doubt yourself and berate yourself daily, try something different – forgiveness for your shortcomings, understanding for your humanness and praise for your efforts.
When someone compliments the dress you are wearing, the work you have done or how generous you are, do you find yourself minimising yourself or denying your kind acts or even saying ‘well, I could have done that better”?
Next time someone shows genuine appreciation towards you try simply saying “Thank You’ and return their compliment with a smile. Let the enjoyment sink in and just feel good about yourself.
Give yourself time
Do something you truly enjoy, read a book, take a walk or spend time in nature or meditation. The space you will feel from taking time out for pure enjoyment will lift your spirits and your sense of self-worth will grow as you realise ‘I matter’.
Practice these few simple things for the next few weeks and let us know how much more you appreciate yourself, how much lighter and calmer you feel and how much your self-love has grown.
Pathway to Self Love Course
You might also want to take a look at our Pathway To Self-Love Course coming later in the year. This 6 week course will help you to delve deeper into your own negative patterns and self-saboteurs and find a way to love yourself deeply and with ease.
Our Pathway to Self-Love Course is all about cultivating self-love. Self-Love isn’t about being selfish, self-absorbed or narcissistic. It’s about connecting with your innate human needs, nourishing your soul and making time to enjoy the beautiful life you have been given. There will be meditations, activities and weekly tasks, as well as suggested reading (optional) all designed to heal, soothe and empower you back to a place of self-love.
Click the link below to see information on our upcoming courses, and to book your space.